4 Things Your Therapist Wants You to Know

Therapy can be mysterious and intimidating, especially if you don’t know what to expect. Here’s what therapists wish you knew about couples therapy: 

Going to therapy doesn’t mean your relationship is broken. “It’s not a good sign if we need to go therapy!” “We’re not like those couples!” I hear these phrases a lot, and they’re just plain wrong. Therapy is invaluable, especially when your relationship is in distress. In addition, couples therapy is preventative, just like bi-annual dental cleanings and a yearly physical with your primary care physician.

Your therapist will not convince you to break-up or get divorced. Therapists will always help you identify problem areas and encourage you to fully explore them. But, they will never force you to end your relationship. Your insight and goals for therapy are incredibly important, and a good therapist will follow your lead. 

It’s okay to go to bed angry. If its difficult to reach a resolution or each attempt at reconciliation leads to more arguing, it’s okay to go to bed. The problem will still be there in the morning, but it might be easier to face after a good night’s sleep.

Feeling regret doesn’t mean you made the wrong decision. It’s not uncommon to feel regret from time to time, especially when you keep running into the same issue over and over again. Regret is not necessarily a sign that your relationship is doomed. It’s simply a reminder that you need to pay closer attention to your relationship in order to figure out what’s keeping you stuck.